Use Words Wisely

“Words, so powerful. They can crush a heart, or heal it. They can shame a soul, or liberate it. They can shatter dreams, or energize them. They can obstruct connection, or invite it. They can create defenses, or melt them. We have to use words wisely” – Jeff Brown

I love this quote from Jeff Brown, an author and editor in New York. He told us how powerful words can be.

We use words everyday to communicate with others or express ourselves. Use them mindlessly, they cause damages to you. Use them wisely; they work towards your advantages.

Try not to take every word said by others into your heart, especially those that make your stomach drop. Why? Believe it or not, most people are not great communicators. When they express, their words always make the listeners project differently from what they really mean.

Words have crushed many hearts. What if some words cut you open like a sword? Maybe they are just not thoughtful or unintentional. These words might come from those who matter to you. What do you do when it happens to you? You forgive; even though it might be hard for you to forget.

It’s hard to forget how certain words make us feel. However, you can always react differently: smile, forgive and let go.

Words can also shame innocent souls. Lizzie Velasquez used to be a victim. She suffers from a rare syndrome that prevents her from gaining weight. Words from others have always been cruel on her. Instead of being defeated by her disadvantages or having a pity party in the backyard, she chose to work hard and eventually became an author and motivational speaker. In my opinion, she is the world’s most beautiful woman. Confidence is more than just attraction. Here is Lizzie on the TED Stage in 2014.

We can all learn from Lizzie: use negativities posted by others as your motivations to achieve your success. Words can be hurtful, but you can always turn them around and use them as your inspirations.

If words ever broke you hearts, the best we can do is to ensure our words are thoughtful and don’t cause damages to others. I know it’s a tough thing to do because it’s difficult to watch every word you say on a daily basis. The wisest advice I’ve ever heard is what my mother told me when I was 5: “Listen more, talk less. There are always unknown troubles from too many words.” This may not be your motto for life but it works at least in sensitive environment. Such has been her lifelong motto, and it worked fantastically for her until her voluntary retirement in 2014 after 30 years serving as a Chinese government official.

When not sure if it’s safe to use certain words, use silence to fill the void. Saying nothing is the best response under uncertainty. Words said are like water poured out of the pot: once they are said, there is no going back.

All emotions can be generated from words we use. Now you may think words can be the devils that caused all existing world problems. Yes they certain can given the power they have.

While trying not to let others’ words affect how we feel, we should use our words wisely so others don’t get burned.